The Slip and Slide of Moral Decay

First of all, if you still come here to check in on me, thanks. And, I’m sorry for not posting much of anything anymore…but that leads me to my point…

I’m packing up my rucksack and heading out to whoknowswhereville.

It’s not that I have writer’s block. Or that I don’t want to write anymore. I do. I just don’t think it’s here that I want to do it. For example, I’m still writing for the City Paper, and I’m having fun. But that’s not the kind of writing that I’m talking about either. I mean, it’s not easy expressing yourself in 500 words that have to be about local blogs and podcasts…

We all have amazing stories. We walk down the streets, some with heads up, others with heads down, and we don’t know the people that we’re avoiding, opening doors for, asking the time from, or giving the finger to. They’re as chock-full of funny, bizarre, sad, and so-real-they’re-absolutely terrifying stories as we are. And I’m one of the we, right? I’ve got some ideas milling about in my head that merit a closer look, and that’s exactly what I’m-a gonna do.

I’m still going to share my stories with y’all via the podcast that Annie and I do. For those of you who listen, we both thank you very much! For those of you that haven’t, may thousands of tiny robots that shoot spiders out of their eyes climb into your bed while you sleep…waitaminute. That’s no way to market a show…see what 4 months out of work can do to a man? How ’bout this - if you haven’t listened yet, please consider listening to an episode on the way to work one morning. If you like it, let us know. If you don’t…well…tiny robots…

As far as writing goes, I think my writing’s going to stay on a hard drive until it’s all clean and shiny, and ready for you to read. Well, not entirely clean and shiny. That’s not my style. I mean, have you ever seen so many “y’all’s” and “…’s” and words like “informations” in your life before? I still love that word, informations. Go ‘head. Say it. You can’t say it without grinning just a little. “oh. sure. I have all the informations right here.”

Who knows? Maybe I’ll start another blog a la MooCow (hasta la vista and bon voyage by the way, buddy. And right when I may be moving your way, too…but that’s another story), but I highly doubt it. My gut’s telling me to write in more of an old-school fashion, with editing, structure, and a point and stuff, no?

But fret not, my babies. You can still find me very easiy on the interwebs (another favorite word of mine). My column shows up each Wednesday in the City Paper, I will probably be adding a blog component to that shortly, and you can always find Annie and I at www.jayandannie.com and listen to our show…

Thanks again for spending the past couple of years online with me. I’m still reading a lot of your sites, too, so just because I’m not commenting doesn’t mean that I’m not reading.

Look - let’s not a make a big deal about this, ok? Just know that everytime you see an icy cold beer in a frosty mug, a guitar resting up against a beat up old amplifier, kids playing kickball, karaoke in cheesy bars, or some little rugrat wrist-deep in his nose and grinning like a champ, I’m there.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ve got a TON of tiny robots to build.

Oh, and some writing to do, too.

Puppies and kittens,
-Jay AKA the Kickball Superstar

Thanks for listening, y’all!

We really appreciate all of the emails and comments, so keep ‘em coming!

Click on the yellow icon thing to listen to our show!

Show Notes:
:00 Chewin’ the Fat Intro
1:10 Annie’s impression of her mom
1:21 Jay’s impression of Annie
1:28 Annie is wrong?!?!?!
1:49 Topic 1: Moving
2:59 Annie and the bag of poo
5:24 Topic 2: Movies
7:10 Annie as Akeelah
7:32 Yelling at teens in the theater. (Man, I’m old)
9:10 That’s how weak gazelles get killed
9:22 The Onion Radio News!
10:10 Topic 3: Minneapolis, Milwaukee, and MLS listings
11:50 I didn’t want to move then, would you?
12:50 SFTNW 22 – Broadcasting from where?
13:00 Annie is a born and bred Southern girl
13:13 Where cold is invented
14:15 Let Annie know to not be afraid
14:20 New tourism angle?
15:20 One of Annie’s secret dreams
16:40 We’re excitable
17:49 Podcast Promo: The Redboy Podcast featuring Absolute Amy
19:00 Topic 3: Mucho Dinero (No tenemos)
20:00 We meet a future Sweet Sixteen’er
22:30 Topic 4: A Magnificent Present!
25:00 Wanna eat BBQ with us?
25:45 Topic 5: This Week in TV
27:48 Topic 6: The Best. Drink. Ever.
29:18 Jay is full of bubbles
29:50 Wanna send Jay a birthday e-card?
29:55 We have a new address! jayandannie.com
30:15 Expect big things this year
30:38 This show was hit and miss
30:55 Annie plugs her favorite new movie
31:20 Elton helps us say goodbye (”The Annie Mix”)

Here’s the show y’all! I’ve got to go book Annie’s moving truck now (you’ll see…)

Click the shiny yellow thing to start the show!

Thanks and keep the emails and comments coming!

-Annie and Jay

Show Notes:
:00 Intro to sweet 16
:41 Annie provides all the topics
1:51 Thanks for listening to the shortest show ever - kidding!
2:08 Lost
3:30 Would you date Annie?
4:00 Annie forgets that people can’t see us
4:20 Annie and Jay go fishing = catch trees, lose shoes, and cut legs
9:23 Annie tooks and leaved it
9:48 The Onion Radio News
10:35 We eat the Best. Meal. Ever.
13:20 Podcast Pickle promo
13:44 Jay loves him so DVR
16:16 Annie is moving.
16:51 Guys’ houses vs. Girls’ houses
18:47 Annie invents a grocery aid
21:39 Jay and DVR are running away together
21:54 Promo: The Zee and Zed Show
23:07 Annie’s couch vs. Jay’s sack of potatoes
24:33 Suri Cruise exerts her alien powers on my TV
29:00 Good-bye/The Outdoor Type

Forgive us, Father for we have sinned. It’s been two weeks since our last podcast.

But here it is in all it’s glory. Click the little icon thingie below to listen to the show!

And while you’re listening to the show, you can check out the show notes that are below…

Thanks for the comments and emails! Keep ‘em coming! You can also put yourself on our map, take our survey, or donate via PayPal. But don’t do all of those things - that’d just be ridiculous. Pick one and run with it…or just tell a friend to tune in!

In Nomeni Wal-Mart, Et TV, Et Lenny and Steve,

-Jay

Show Notes:
:00 Intro
:08 Doing it Our Way!
1:23 Voted America’s Best Podcast…By Our Mothers
1:55 Did you wonder if we broke up?
2:33 Diagram of an Annie and Jay fight
3:03 Hobo recieves a “Standing O!”
4:32 Schlitz Malt Liquor - “It busts a cap in all other malt liquors’ asses, yo.”
5:35 Scenes From the Next Whatever - the Improv Show!
7:09 Annie’s parents are coming into town.
7:21 We interrupt this broadcast…with The Onion Radio News!
8:21 Spring has sprung!
9:25 Annie’s moment of clarity
10:35 The Tale of Acid Man and Underage Drinking Girl at the Quasi-College Corral
18:35 Annie meets a potential roommate/serial killer
19:37 Podcast Promo: Me and the Bean
21:20 It’s Job Interview Season!!!!
22:59 Compare and contrast: Lutheran vs. Catholic services
27:23 This Week in TV - Lost and Grey’s Anatomy
29:20 Happy Anniversary, Nate and Di!
29:40 Thanks for the emails and Paypal donations!
30:00 Annie is vindicated
30:40 I hate Wal-mart, but LOVED Super Walk-mart!
31:20 Annie loves lenses!
32:25 Annie gives out my address
33:05 Thanks for listening!
33:20 Toodly-doodily

Last night was GREAT! I didn’t flub any lines, I think only missed one dance move, and I didn’t pull a Bobby Brady and have my voice crack during a song! People were laughing their asses off at all the right moments, and we got a great response from the crowd as we did the little everyone hold hands while walking up to the front of the stage and bowing together theater bow thing

To all the drama students that I may or may not have been mean/dismissive/snobbish/downright rude to in high school, please accept my belated apology. This stuff’s just as much fun as strapping on 30lbs of pads and running full-bore into another 200lb dude with 30lbs of pads on, too!

We had about 100 folks at our show, and we’re hoping to sell out (130) Saturday’s show.

So, if you’re in the area, please come to the show (Nate and Di, I’m looking in your direction).

Doing one of those fruity theater bows,
-Jay

PS - Annie gave me the greatest pre-show gift last night. I got a really funny card, and inside it said, “I thought that instead of flowers, a guy would probably like burritos” - and there was a gift certificate to my favorite burrito joint in town. Thanks, girl. That was great!

I know I’m not writing much anymore, but I’ll try to put something up once a week now. Let’s say Mondays? It can be part of your back to work but not ready to start working routine. sound good?

good.

Whistles go WOO-WOO!

Happy Friday, everybody!

Tune in and listen to the latest scoop! Jay’s in a musical, Annie has an OCD freakout in a theater, and we rap about botulism…That’s right. a rap about botulism. and salmonella.

Thanks for the comments and emails! Keep ‘em coming! You can also put yourself on our map, take our survey, or donate via PayPal. But don’t do all of those things - that’d just be ridiculous. Pick one and run with it…or just tell a friend to tune in!

Have a great weekend, y’all.
-Jay and Annie

Show Notes:
:00 Now with 27% more funny!
1:55 Topic 1: Annie’s new job
2:34 Theory of Coworkers
3:24 Friday is Jeans Day
5:00 Jay’s new annoying catch phrase
5:20 Topic 2: H for Hobo
7:30 Let’s go down theatre street!
9:25 Come to the show, so I can eat.
9:42 Annie and I perform 3/29
10:30 Annie lays down the law
11:16 Topic 3: Botulism…from dented cans?
12:19 It’s really hard to cut unpitted olives
13:58 Everything in hip-hop is true
14:28 Topic 4: V for Vendetta/Annie’s OCD Hell
21:10 Jay fixes the mixes
22:22 Topics 5 & 6: Jay - the Next Top Chef?
24:10 Topic 7: Church?!?
26:13 Jay gets an interview!
27:30 ‘Bama bound?
28:39 Jay pretends to not like being a drama queen
29:29 The Fighting Gnomes rock!
31:42 Email us! Leave us comments! Send us promos!
32:00 Thanks Nobodies and Zee and Zed show! (And while I forgot to mention them on the show, I also want to send a shout to Me and the Bean!
32:27 Jason gets zinged!
32:35 We get Blunted
35:53 Bonus!

Fate has a twisted sense of humor.

As many of you know, I’m still looking for a “real” job. Sure, I write a weekly column for the City Paper, host trivia nights at bars around town, and appear in a few improv acts to make ends meet, but I still haven’t found that 9-5 (or 10-3 if that’s cool with you, future boss of mine) that floats my boat. And it looks like it ain’t gonna be in this one-horse town anyway, but that’s another story.

Late last week I was asked to be in a musical written by a couple of my improv buddies (so you KNOW it’s gonna be funny) and their friend. It’s called HOBO: A Fight for Survival. Seems they couldn’t think of a better person to play Marvin, the former president of a major company who now lives on the streets, than me - a former “suit” who doesn’t have a job, and isn’t above picking up change on the streets.

So, that said - if you’re in the Charleston area, come see our show. It’s pretty frickin’ funny, and I get a cut of the door.

Speaking of cutting, If you can’t make it, tell a friend to attend, or so help me, I will cut you! It’s just some extra change, man…what? you think you’re better than me?!

oh…sorry…got too into character there…

Hope to see you there!

Welcome back, everybody!

Lots of info in this jam-packed show, so let’s get right to it, shall we?

Show Notes:
:00 Chewin’ the fat
:41 Annie got a job!
1:56 One down, one to go
3:00 We love Hoops and Yoyo (wanna sponsor us, guys?)
3:28 Send Annie’s mom a b-day e-card!
3:55 Nine topics in no particular order
4:14 The cats are doing it
6:12 We confront the cats
6:37 Jay lives on meat and cheese
9:00 Annie’s one-year anniversary with her other boyfriend
9:25 This Week In TV
11:24 Annie’s attempt at a British accent
12:27 Jay makes stupid-but funny-jokes
17:15 Annie’s improv show
19:19 The Sofa Kings - the “next big thing?”
20:24 MySpace might have Jumped the Shark
20:41 Annie remembers her 21st birthday at City Bar
21:10 Jay’s driving v. walking hypothesis
22:52 Zap! Who Will Your 10 Be?
24:00 We may be rich by the time you read this
24:50 House Party USA
27:30 Thanks everyone, and thanks Pickle People!
28:00 Email us or leave us a comment
28:15 Paypal, Frappr, and Surveys
28:30 Just Choose One!
29:21 Kick Butt=Get Buck, Annie.
33:01 Bonus Feature!!!! Roommate Matt Speaks!!!!

Hey everybody!

We’re back and (hopefully sounding) better than ever.

Click this shiny new button for Episode 12: Annie and Jay v2.0 - (and all our other episodes! They’re all on this here new-fangled player we done got for free from Podtrac!)

Please fill out our listener survey, send us an email to jayandannie@gmail.com or leave us a comment at http://jayandannie.blogsome.com!

Thanks so much for listening!!!
-Jay

Show notes below:
:00 Death by podcast
:10 America’s Best Podcast
:57 Do you know what I mean?
1:41 Annie and Jay v2.0
2:10 Black socks and coffee mugs
2:43 This Week in TV
3:15 Too much Botox
4:09 We got flava
5:09 I love it when we’re cruisin’ together
5:40 We’re a package deal
7:00 I’m Sofa King funny
9:05 www.myspace.com/thesofakings99/
9:42 Wanna see Annie and I do improv?
10:11 We like Grey’s Anatomy
10:28 We LOVE the public library
12:28 CSI, SUV, or SVU…whatever
13:48 The Sexpot and the Teacher
15:45 We like Kelly Clarkson, Joe!
17:27 Does anyone else like Project Runway?
20:19 Thanks, Podcast Pickle forums!
20:33 Shout out to Rick!
21:13 Thanks Angel!
22:14 We stress out about our job situation
23:24 Annie gets an email
24:00 We have a minor freak out about our job situation
25:38 Please fill out our audience survey!
26:58 We compose ourselves
28:29 Everything is fine
28:47 Email us or leave us a comment at jayandannie@gmail.com or http://jayandannie.blogsome.com
29:29 All is not lost

What was supposed to be here was Episode 12: Annie and Jay Version 2.0

but…

Dammit! We lost a 30 minute show in the editing process, so we’re gonna do one tomorrow. But in the meantime - here’s what’s shaking:

1) Thanks to everyone at the Podcast Pickle Forums for your help on our recording issues.
2) We’re now using REAL MICS and a mixer (Thanks Roommate Matt!).
3) Please fill out our audience survey - it’ll take 5 seconds and is completely anonymous. We’re just trying to pay bills, y’all.
4) We’re still looking for jobs.
5) I can’t believe that friggin’ computer crashed.
6) Thanks Angel for the voiceover work. If you need some done, email us!
7) Thanks for the kind words, Nate and Di. We got your back, too.

We’ll put our heads together and put another show together tomorrow. New segment (This Week In TV), and other exciting things now that we sound quasi-professional!

Thanks!
-Jay